ARE YOU HAPPY?
‘Haven’t you got everything you need?’
‘I have everything a woman could want.’
‘What’s wrong with your life then?’
‘Precisely that. I have everything, but I am not happy. And I’m not the only one either; over the years, I’ve met and interviewed all kinds of people: the rich, the poor, the powerful, and those who just make do. I’ve seen the same infinite bitterness in everyone’s eyes, a sadness which people weren’t always prepared to acknowledge, but which, regardless of what they were telling me, was nevertheless there. Are you listening?’
‘Yes, I’m listening. I was just thinking. So, according to you, no one is happy?’
‘Some people appear to be happy, but they simply don’t give the matter much thought. Others make plans: I’m going to have a husband, a home, two children, a house in the country. As long as they’re busy doing that, they’re like bulls looking for bullfighter: they react instinctively, they blunder on, with no idea where the target is. They get their car, sometimes they even get a Ferrari, and the think that’s the meaning of life, and they never question it. Yet, their eyes betray the sadness that even they don’t know they carry in their soul. Are you happy?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘I don’t know if everyone is unhappy. I know they’re all busy: working overtime, worrying about their children, their husband, their career, their degree, what they’re going to do tomorrow, what they need to buy, what they need to have in order not to feel inferior, etc. Very few people actually say to me: “I’m unhappy.” Most say: “I’m fine, I’ve got everything I ever wanted.” Then I ask: “What makes you happy?” Answer: “I’ve got everything a person could possibly want – a family, a home, work, good health.” I ask again: “Have you ever stopped to wonder if that’s there is to life?” Answer: “Yes, that’s all there is.” I insist: “So meaning of life is work, family, children who will grow up and leave you, a wife or husband who will become more like a friend than a real lover. And, of course, one day your work will end too. What will you do when that happens?” Answer: there is no answer. They change the subject.’
‘No, what they say is: “When the children have grown up, when my husband – or my wife – has become more my friend than my passionate lover, when I retire, then I’ll have more time to do what I always wanted to do: travel.” Question: “But didn’t you say you were happy now? Aren’t you already doing what you always wanted to do?” Then they say they’re very busy and change the subject.’
‘If I insist, they always do come up with something they’re lacking. The businessman hasn’t yet closed the deal he wanted, the housewife would like to have more independence and more money, the boy who’s in love is afraid of losing his girlfriend, the new graduate wonders if he chose his career or if it was chosen for him, the dentist who wanted to be a singer, the singer wanted to be a politician, the politician wanted to be a writer, the writer wanted to be a farmer. And even when I did meet someone who was doing what he had chosen to do, that person’s soul was still in torment. He hadn’t found peace yet either. So I’ll ask you again: “Are you happy?”’
- An excerpt from The Zahir, by Paulo Coelho-
‘I have everything a woman could want.’
‘What’s wrong with your life then?’
‘Precisely that. I have everything, but I am not happy. And I’m not the only one either; over the years, I’ve met and interviewed all kinds of people: the rich, the poor, the powerful, and those who just make do. I’ve seen the same infinite bitterness in everyone’s eyes, a sadness which people weren’t always prepared to acknowledge, but which, regardless of what they were telling me, was nevertheless there. Are you listening?’
‘Yes, I’m listening. I was just thinking. So, according to you, no one is happy?’
‘Some people appear to be happy, but they simply don’t give the matter much thought. Others make plans: I’m going to have a husband, a home, two children, a house in the country. As long as they’re busy doing that, they’re like bulls looking for bullfighter: they react instinctively, they blunder on, with no idea where the target is. They get their car, sometimes they even get a Ferrari, and the think that’s the meaning of life, and they never question it. Yet, their eyes betray the sadness that even they don’t know they carry in their soul. Are you happy?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘I don’t know if everyone is unhappy. I know they’re all busy: working overtime, worrying about their children, their husband, their career, their degree, what they’re going to do tomorrow, what they need to buy, what they need to have in order not to feel inferior, etc. Very few people actually say to me: “I’m unhappy.” Most say: “I’m fine, I’ve got everything I ever wanted.” Then I ask: “What makes you happy?” Answer: “I’ve got everything a person could possibly want – a family, a home, work, good health.” I ask again: “Have you ever stopped to wonder if that’s there is to life?” Answer: “Yes, that’s all there is.” I insist: “So meaning of life is work, family, children who will grow up and leave you, a wife or husband who will become more like a friend than a real lover. And, of course, one day your work will end too. What will you do when that happens?” Answer: there is no answer. They change the subject.’
‘No, what they say is: “When the children have grown up, when my husband – or my wife – has become more my friend than my passionate lover, when I retire, then I’ll have more time to do what I always wanted to do: travel.” Question: “But didn’t you say you were happy now? Aren’t you already doing what you always wanted to do?” Then they say they’re very busy and change the subject.’
‘If I insist, they always do come up with something they’re lacking. The businessman hasn’t yet closed the deal he wanted, the housewife would like to have more independence and more money, the boy who’s in love is afraid of losing his girlfriend, the new graduate wonders if he chose his career or if it was chosen for him, the dentist who wanted to be a singer, the singer wanted to be a politician, the politician wanted to be a writer, the writer wanted to be a farmer. And even when I did meet someone who was doing what he had chosen to do, that person’s soul was still in torment. He hadn’t found peace yet either. So I’ll ask you again: “Are you happy?”’
- An excerpt from The Zahir, by Paulo Coelho-
Comments
u c, i spend 2mins on a blog, thus, need to reread it at home. just that i cannot wait to put down a comment… hehehehe.
Takeshi | 01.19.06 – 9:57 am | #
thank you gina
yzzi | 01.19.06 – 1:01 pm | #
it’s been a long time since i last read any of paulo coelho’s books. glad you reminded me that his profound works are still out there
eternity | Homepage | 01.19.06 – 2:32 pm | #
like some people say, happiness is just a state of mind. nothing more.
yuin | Homepage | 01.19.06 – 4:22 pm | #
are you happy, YES
EQUALS TO
are you happy, NO
that’s life
VJ | 01.20.06 – 2:02 pm | #
Takeshi: I thank you for your 2 mins.
yzzi: You’re welcomed.
eternity: This book is good. But it depresses me.
Yuin: I guess so. Usually when people cannot figure out what’s in their mind, that is when they gone bonkers.
VJ: Human eh? Hard to please.
Gina | Homepage | 01.21.06 – 3:09 pm | #
it’s always more than that in yours when i read at home….hehee.
always takeshi | 01.21.06 – 5:32 pm | #
u quoted excellent examples of joy and suffering crushed together like the 2 sides of a coin. u crave for what u have not, u despair when u are separated from what u have gained. b4 that u worry about losing what u have – which eventually u will cos nothing is permanent. in all that turmoil, u encounter pockets of happiness. am i happy?? of course!! why???
happy | 02.06.06 – 2:16 pm | #