YOU'RE FIRED

You're Fired!

Disclaimer: This is a bad mouthing post. For those who do not approve of such post, please don’t read. It might disturb the emotions of certain people. Should the story here coincide with any persons in real life, please accept my humble apology. THIS IS A TRUE STORY.

My ex boss, “I have no choice but to ask for your resignation letter. Please clear whatever that is outstanding, take one month salary and leave.”

McD couldn’t maintain her composure and cried. After a few seconds, she retorted, “I have been waiting for so long for you to say that!”

My ex boss, who is hypertensive. almost stopped breathing and died of cardiac arrest.

Talking about having a psycho as a colleague.

She joined my ex company last year May. Her nick derived out of her arch eyebrows which resembles the arch of the ever famous fast food chain, McD. She has the habit of drawing her eyebrows in the office toilet to perfect symmetrical arch (exactly like the golden arch) every time she visits the toilet. She would then frantically “combed” her hair with her fingers (more like pulling her hair) till dozens of strands of hair fell on the sink in the toilet and she couldn’t be bothered cleaning it up.

She was a terror to fellow colleagues not only because of her disgusting and queer hygiene behavior. Lack of responsibility, inconsiderate, rude, aloof, lack of discipline.... are some of the reasons she was sacked. And it is amazing that it took my ex boss a year and a half to do just that.

She has this weird habit of walking around in the office with a paper bag. Some of you might find this amusing, but we feared for the worst. She might have a knife in it and would go on a rampage if we provoked her.

She likes to drink tea. And usually, after her tea drinking sessions, she would keep the soaked leaves and munch on them. I hope tea has calming effect.

Once I brought food from home. After unloading all my containers on the pantry table, I left the paper bag in the pantry. The paper bag disappeared immediately before lunch. I was furious.

One fine Saturday (off day) when some of us went back to office to clear our workload, we did the unspeakable. We inspected her drawer as we suspected that our stationery were stolen by her. She was the only new colleague at that point of time. We have yet to experience such problems before she came.

To our horror, we found everyone’s stationery in her drawer, together with four empty dirty cups (the tea lady was puzzled over missing cups for the past few weeks) and my paper bag!

I don’t know what has become of her. She seemed to have unresolved issues with men as she said all men are bastards. (I agreed with her for once, though not entirely. Most men are bastards)

We regretted for not having to get to know about her past which caused these (the eyebrows, the hair pulling, the tea leaves munching, paper bag fetish, stealing, keeping dirty cups in drawers, etc) and offered help. We prayed that she would be fine after causing such ordeal to other people. We hope she would find a man who would make her happy.

We hope not to bump into her on the streets.

Update: Well, the job that would guarantee me an apartment and RAV 4 had just flown off the window. I liken it as a deep sea fishing adventure. The swordfish just got away.