THE ORGANIC HORROR OF SEVEN SPINSTERS
Friend: So, What are you doing this weekend?
Self: Going off to some farm with six spinsters, to get in touch with the vegetables as therapy.
Friend: Cucumber?
Self: I prefer carrots.
Bad alternative to Diet Camps
Nope. I am not talking about ghost stories or the new movie, the Village. Perhaps a little bit of the Village. Like the story goes, it was a man made hoax to prevent villagers from migrating out of the village (something to that effect – I have yet to watch it). In Titi Eco Farm Resort, the owner closes its door by 6.00 p.m. to prevent its hapless patrons from escaping involuntary detention at its “resort”.
Titi Eco Farm is situated in between Semenyih and Kuala Klawang. If you don’t know the directions there, stop to ask the friendly people in Semenyih, they would be more than happy to help you. (If you still plan to go after reading this blog). The map given is totally useless.
Self: Uncle#! Is this the way to Titi Eco Farm? *Showed him the map*
Uncle: *Gulp* It’s a jungle out there! You sure you ladies wanna go there? You sure?
# In Malaysia, we address anyone older than us by Uncle or Auntie out of courtesy, even if we have no relations.
The seven of us – all unmarried ladies in their late 20s and early 30s went to this farm organized by Ms Tambi (my gullible ex manager) on Saturday. We parted in two separate cars – my car catered for those under 30 (Still-got-hope spinsters) while Ms Tambi’s car took those above 30 (running-out-of-time spinsters).
The journey sure dampened anyone’s mood – winding road and uphill. Those who have motion sickness – get ready your puke bags. No wonder Uncle was worried when we stopped for directions. There was an overturn lorry at one sharp corner. The only consolation was probably the nice view at Semenyih dam.
Semenyih dam
It is not a boring place if you are a FANATIC organic food lover. Ms Tambi and another friend seemed to be enjoying themselves. It is definitely not a place for those city dwellers who couldn’t last an hour in the morning without a cup of caffeine laden beverage – coffee.
We were shocked when we were denied hot water to make our own coffee this morning, as the workers at this “resort” insisted us to have a healthy lifestyle – making us drink water from unidentified boiled leaves and a plate of fruit platter with dried hibiscus petals as breakfast.
Eating Vagina
Ms Tambi: What are you eating?
Self: Vagina.
Come to think of it, aren’t that reproductive organs of a plant? Fruits – ovaries, petals – vaginas, pollen – sperms, etc?
It was indeed an uneventful two days. The elderly were so bored that they asked if they could play mahjong. The children complained about the food. I saw a kid with red spots all over her face. What do you expect? It is a mosquitoes infested area. I think we are there to feed these blood suckers. They should pay us instead! At night, it was the mosquitoes net securing you from all kinds of bugs hovering at your verandah. Scary. It were as if you were in some B grade movie, featuring flesh-eating bugs.
Children at the brink of suicide over hunger
There is nothing much to talk about this trip except boredom, no coffee, eating plants reproductive organs, complaints, complaints and more complaints. Not to mention you have risk your life driving on the winding road.
And you have to wash your own dishes. A mother was screaming at her son for leaving the mug for her to wash. She reacted by throwing the forks and spoons into the basket provided as if she had been possessed by a lazy ghost. Should have brought along her maid to this resort.
TFF, YCF and myself went back earlier than scheduled as we couldn’t tolerate another meal with the five shades of greens. We went to Ampang for Yong Tau Foo instead.
Ampang Yong Tau Foo
Some pics of Titi Eco Farm Resort. Looks can be deceiving. Now I understand.
Conned by the alluring exterior of the resort
The Swamp thing?
Sunset
Pretty Yellow Flowers in such a boring place
Self: Going off to some farm with six spinsters, to get in touch with the vegetables as therapy.
Friend: Cucumber?
Self: I prefer carrots.
Bad alternative to Diet Camps
Nope. I am not talking about ghost stories or the new movie, the Village. Perhaps a little bit of the Village. Like the story goes, it was a man made hoax to prevent villagers from migrating out of the village (something to that effect – I have yet to watch it). In Titi Eco Farm Resort, the owner closes its door by 6.00 p.m. to prevent its hapless patrons from escaping involuntary detention at its “resort”.
Titi Eco Farm is situated in between Semenyih and Kuala Klawang. If you don’t know the directions there, stop to ask the friendly people in Semenyih, they would be more than happy to help you. (If you still plan to go after reading this blog). The map given is totally useless.
Self: Uncle#! Is this the way to Titi Eco Farm? *Showed him the map*
Uncle: *Gulp* It’s a jungle out there! You sure you ladies wanna go there? You sure?
# In Malaysia, we address anyone older than us by Uncle or Auntie out of courtesy, even if we have no relations.
The seven of us – all unmarried ladies in their late 20s and early 30s went to this farm organized by Ms Tambi (my gullible ex manager) on Saturday. We parted in two separate cars – my car catered for those under 30 (Still-got-hope spinsters) while Ms Tambi’s car took those above 30 (running-out-of-time spinsters).
The journey sure dampened anyone’s mood – winding road and uphill. Those who have motion sickness – get ready your puke bags. No wonder Uncle was worried when we stopped for directions. There was an overturn lorry at one sharp corner. The only consolation was probably the nice view at Semenyih dam.
Semenyih dam
Itinery Saturday, 21 August 2004
2.00 pm – Checking in
3.00 pm – Waterfall – unguided. Meaning you have to drive down the long and winding road again yourself and see the waterfall which is now under renovation – what?? Waterfall under renovation? You mean it is not natural? We made a pass. I brought my swimsuit for nothing.
5.00 pm – Fibre Bread making demonstration. Looks easy. But the bread taste bland. Prefer the RM3.50 gardenia bread, and you don’t get your hands dirty
6.00 pm – Dinner. It sure consists of five colored vegetables as recommended by the nutritionists for healthy eating– light green, pastel green, dark green, blue green and shit green. I have met my fibre intake quota for the entire week with this one meal.
8.00 pm – Fire Flies – depending on weather. Pathetic. I don’t think I need to pay RM160/- to see that two fire flies at Kuala Selangor even if they are at the brink of extinction. (RM640/- (@#$%^&* expensive if you tell me) quad sharing room with no air condition and the electricity is limited – 12 hours standby solar energy)
8.30 pm - Star gazing. I could see stars from my house balcony, minus the mosquitoes.
9.00 pm – Organic farming methods. I made a pass and went to my room to shower and read a book.
Vegetarian Prison
Itinery – Sunday, 22 August 2004 – Oh… screw it.
It is not a boring place if you are a FANATIC organic food lover. Ms Tambi and another friend seemed to be enjoying themselves. It is definitely not a place for those city dwellers who couldn’t last an hour in the morning without a cup of caffeine laden beverage – coffee.
We were shocked when we were denied hot water to make our own coffee this morning, as the workers at this “resort” insisted us to have a healthy lifestyle – making us drink water from unidentified boiled leaves and a plate of fruit platter with dried hibiscus petals as breakfast.
Eating Vagina
Ms Tambi: What are you eating?
Self: Vagina.
Come to think of it, aren’t that reproductive organs of a plant? Fruits – ovaries, petals – vaginas, pollen – sperms, etc?
It was indeed an uneventful two days. The elderly were so bored that they asked if they could play mahjong. The children complained about the food. I saw a kid with red spots all over her face. What do you expect? It is a mosquitoes infested area. I think we are there to feed these blood suckers. They should pay us instead! At night, it was the mosquitoes net securing you from all kinds of bugs hovering at your verandah. Scary. It were as if you were in some B grade movie, featuring flesh-eating bugs.
Children at the brink of suicide over hunger
There is nothing much to talk about this trip except boredom, no coffee, eating plants reproductive organs, complaints, complaints and more complaints. Not to mention you have risk your life driving on the winding road.
And you have to wash your own dishes. A mother was screaming at her son for leaving the mug for her to wash. She reacted by throwing the forks and spoons into the basket provided as if she had been possessed by a lazy ghost. Should have brought along her maid to this resort.
TFF, YCF and myself went back earlier than scheduled as we couldn’t tolerate another meal with the five shades of greens. We went to Ampang for Yong Tau Foo instead.
Ampang Yong Tau Foo
Some pics of Titi Eco Farm Resort. Looks can be deceiving. Now I understand.
Conned by the alluring exterior of the resort
The Swamp thing?
Sunset
Pretty Yellow Flowers in such a boring place
Comments
where is the ampang yong tau foo place? i wanna go!!
i used to go to the yong tau foo place at masjid jamek there..
ryuu | 08.23.04 – 12:57 am | #
Hahahhahaha….sounds terrible. A trip to remember???
Ann | 08.23.04 – 1:25 am | #
Hahahha… I should move there for a month. Imagine the weight I’ll lose!
james | Homepage | 08.23.04 – 11:07 am | #
Eh, Ryuu? Not in Malaysia meh?
Ampang yong tau foo. I also dunno where. I just sat in the car and they took me there. Probably can take you there when you come back from wherever you are.
Yes Ann. Unforgettable experience. This is the first time going to a trip and can’t wait to go back to KL!
Yes James. You will be as fit as a fiddle – eat organic vege and help out at the farm.
Gina | Homepage | 08.23.04 – 10:03 pm | #
Hey, the five colours look delicious, I would give it a try.
The Monk | 08.24.04 – 12:53 am | #
Monk, my dear.. I will PAY for you to go and stay there. You can even use my car if you want. No one wants to be there.. I tell you. Eating vagina? What were you thinking? Hehe.
Gina | Homepage | 08.24.04 – 1:16 am | #
Gina, u sure can take nice beautiful pictures… i would say you hav the skills of a semi-pro photographer
sugarbaby | 08.24.04 – 7:16 am | #
Sugarbaby: I ain’t no pro. I use Digital Camera – Canon Ixus II. Just click and shoot. And make sure you have steady hands.. also, learn how to take nice angles. It’s inborn. Hahahahha.
Gina | Homepage | 08.25.04 – 12:31 am | #
should not let my lecturer see this article… if not i will get low marks for my coursework since im doin it in titi eco farm… by the way can u giv me some info abt the price to go there
student | 06.23.06 – 11:23 pm | #