AUNT AGONY IN ACTION
*All names are changed in order to protect the not-so-innocent. Hope this would benefit people dealing with the same problems. Permission is sought to publish this*
Love believes all things, trust all things, endures all things...
Please read from bottom up.
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 3:12 PM
To: Missy
Subject: Re: bday in office
I think we have discussed this issue before. It is like what the Buddha said, what goes around, comes around. Also, I remember that this so called guy that you have infatuation is married, right? With kids?
I think I remembered me saying that, so what if you have this guy and make yourself happy? What about the children? They are innocent. They did not do anything to deserve a breakdown in a family. How are they going to live in a broken family? They are affected psychologically.. if not emotionally.
When we marry, we have made a vow in God’s eyes that we will stay true till death do us part? I guess this phrase is meaningless now. Marriage can be easily tampered with.. they should put a new phrase, we will stay true if there is nobody else fancy us, or we still stay true , but if there is another better opportunity, you have no right to stop me?
You are already 27. not 17. I don’t know how can this guy actually made your heart melt. What have he done to steal your heart?
Everyone of us have this picture of our dream guy in our subconscious mind. When we meet the particular person who resembles the dream guy, we will automatically think.. he is THE ONE. He is perfect in every sense. That is why he is called a dream guy. Sadly but true, he only appears in our fantasy. There is no such thing as a dream guy. It is just a hopeful feeling.
Mr Goody is a good guy. He possesses noble characters. He doesn’t get jealous easily, understanding, considerate, .. I am sure you also knew that deep down in his heart, no matter how he is sensitive towards you or trying to be as considerate as possible, he is hurt. He is trying all he can to make you happy.
Bear in mind that everyone has their limitations. If you push Mr Goody too hard, some day, he won’t be able to take it anymore and he will leave. You don’t want this to happen right? it will be tragic.
Perhaps I haven’t met the true great love as yet. Somehow or another, if I were to have crushes or infatuations, I will analyze myself… if it is worth it to fret if I can’t keep them? Will they be happier without me? Then I will wish them all the best in whoever they want to be with, even can be sincerely happy about it.
Last week, I went to visit a friend whom I really had a crush on when his baby is one month old. I was more than happy to show that I am happy for him, even though I don’t like his wife. We had a long history – just me and him, coz he is broken hearted by his wife before they were married, the wife is two timing him. (before marriage). I was his listening ears and a shoulder to cry on for about 1 year …indirectly, I started to develop feelings for him…. then the wife decide to get back to him. I was devastated. He of coz, is happy coz this fool is so much in love with her. He doesn’t know that I love him.. I think he knew yet he doesn’t desert me or avoid me and he shows that he still care for me. As much as I have cared for him previously.
Now, I have accepted that he is married with a kid, even if he is always arguing with his wife over a lot of things.. I didn’t pray that he will break up or divorce. In fact, I hope they will be able to deal with their differences. After all.. this is what marriage is all about.
----- Original Message -----
From: Missy
To: 'Aunt Agony'
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 3:19 PM
Subject: RE: bday in office
Thank you for being very true in your reply to me .. I realize how lucky i am to have Mr Goody... even when i confessed that I have infatuation for another person ... he says that he loves me all the same... and the only way for me to get out of this depression mode is to concentrate in him - (ie to forget the infatuation) and love him... and be faithful and good... that way, will keep things in control for me ... I think he is right ... he is trying really hard to get me a confortable life and is even ok if I do not want to work ..
I will take your advice for sure Gina ... sometimes, I think you are prob the only fren whom I can really speak to.. and who won;t laugh at me... but rather give me true feedback ... and I appreciate this ... I'll repay this when I get the chance to ok...
it is difficult to let go of the person whom I am infautated with ... it is not easy... but you gotta help me through this ... I feel extremely sad needing to let go of this emotion and feeling ... and it brings tears to my eyes a lot of times when I think of them ... but like I said it myself in my message below... all these sufferrrings would not change the outcome ... only difference is how much I hurt ... and it would not be known by the other party anyways ... but Mr Goody is sensitive enough ... when I call him to tell him that I am depressed ... he immediately knows that it is becos I am thinking of the other person ... but kept quiet about it... until I told him I feel depressed cos I am thinking of this other one ... then only he said that he already knows it ... and just did not want to bring it up ... hmmm... I think I should thank the Lord for giving me Mr Goody ...
tell me more to convince me that my infatuation is utterly stupid and silly ... I need to be convinceed.... cos I know this is not the right thing to do... but it holds a big portion in my heart...
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 3:12 PM
To: Missy
Subject: Re: bday in office
aiyoh... why so damn depressed? you are married now for christ's sake. let go all those feelings. one day, when you are old and grey with Mr Goody, resminiscing old times, both of you will laugh at it, how silly you are .. and it is good that Mr Goody stands by you till the very end. I have a feeling that he will stand by you till the end. He is a good guy. Don't take him for granted.
he even knew how to console you. this is a good sign. it says that, no matter how your heart felt, he is always there for you. willing to listen and willing to give you time. there is nobody else who can be as understanding as Mr Goody, I believe. he is emotionally mature for a guy.
no point to fret over someone who doesnt even know that you like him.
for me, i dont care. really. it was just a crush i maintained since i was 15. hahahha. come to think of it. quite silly also.
so, i will make sure i treasure those ppl who are around me now. not wait till they go away or passed away, then only start to regret, why we dont treat them better when they are alive?
----- Original Message -----
From: Missy
To: 'Aunt Agony'
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 2:51 PM
Subject: RE: bday in office
life is sometimes not what we want them to be .... you know ... at times, we expect things from some folks whom we like a lot, and I really mean a LOT... but they may have a different opinion... I know how you feel... cos I feel the same way ... it is difficult to let go of this liking/feeling about this person(s) whom you have developed an infatuation/liking for ... there is this hurt and pain and sorrow that only you can tell yourself.. and no one can delve into this better than you... and though in your heart you know that things are impossible (given the negative responses from the opposite parties).... our hearts just refuse to listen to our brain... and we go into an emotional cycle.. which drains us ... I felt this one time.. and it is definitely not good ... you know what I mean right?
I am beginning to let go of this infatuation and learning to love the right person .. this is honest confession ... and it hurts very badly ... sometimes, when I am alone, it makes me feel like crying ... and then what do I do? I call Mr Goody .. I tell him I am really depressed and why ... he tells me to let go of the feeling .. I am trying very hard ... very very hard .. but it is difficult .. cos I am a rather "emotionally-stubborn" person - and moreover, this is my emotion/feelings.. not just another piece of old clothing that we cna easily throw away and forget ... right?
in my brain, I know this is the right thing to do .. but my heart just puts more slashes to my heart and cuts it deep ... cos I really treasure this feeling ... but at the end of the day ... with millions of slashes and cuts, the end-result would remain the same ... no change .. and to think about it .. the other party may not even know this kind/serious turmoil that we are going through ... and they woudl not change anyways... regardless... so, there is no true point in continually feeling hurt and sad...
sorry, I have been in kinda a depression mode for a little bit... and that is why I write these smoothly on an email to you today ... I hope my telling you my misery, you'll feel better ... though it may not be the exact same thing ... life has got to go on... let go and let's go on ... I am trying hard .. I hope you can too... and I know you can do it better ... cos you have a stronger character than me ... right Gina? I am still very sad now ... to say the least....
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 2:07 PM
To: Missy
Subject: Re: bday in office
what to do? ong also useless. ppl still extend my probation.
so how? yesterday i consulted a friend. she said to quit my job.
saying ppl with my capabilities dont worry not getting job outside.
good news. i already got my ACIS. which is my license!
decide to forget about tai tau totally after he failed to call me on my bday.
just an sms 2 days in advanced
----- Original Message -----
From: Missy
To: 'Aunt Agony'
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 1:02 PM
Subject: RE: bday in office
sure of course ong punya ... don't worry :)
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 11:39 AM
To: Missy
Subject: Re: bday in office
yeah. he is ok looking. got nice buck teeth. so cute. hahaha
they say purplish red is ong color. so i also hope to ong on my bday.
----- Original Message -----
From: Missy
To: 'Aunt Agony'
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 11:28 AM
Subject: RE: bday in office
lucky you ...
that guy is ok looking ... but seems to be good fit for husband candidate ... too bad taken? how officially taken should be the question ... heheheheh... hey, I like you in your outfit... fits your _expression and emotions very nicely ... cozy and comfy... :)
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 11:01 AM
To: Undisclosed-Recipient:;
Subject: bday in office
see how nice my colleagues are to me. unfortunately, they are not my boss.
cute or not that guy? too bad taken.
Love believes all things, trust all things, endures all things...
Please read from bottom up.
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 3:12 PM
To: Missy
Subject: Re: bday in office
I think we have discussed this issue before. It is like what the Buddha said, what goes around, comes around. Also, I remember that this so called guy that you have infatuation is married, right? With kids?
I think I remembered me saying that, so what if you have this guy and make yourself happy? What about the children? They are innocent. They did not do anything to deserve a breakdown in a family. How are they going to live in a broken family? They are affected psychologically.. if not emotionally.
When we marry, we have made a vow in God’s eyes that we will stay true till death do us part? I guess this phrase is meaningless now. Marriage can be easily tampered with.. they should put a new phrase, we will stay true if there is nobody else fancy us, or we still stay true , but if there is another better opportunity, you have no right to stop me?
You are already 27. not 17. I don’t know how can this guy actually made your heart melt. What have he done to steal your heart?
Everyone of us have this picture of our dream guy in our subconscious mind. When we meet the particular person who resembles the dream guy, we will automatically think.. he is THE ONE. He is perfect in every sense. That is why he is called a dream guy. Sadly but true, he only appears in our fantasy. There is no such thing as a dream guy. It is just a hopeful feeling.
Mr Goody is a good guy. He possesses noble characters. He doesn’t get jealous easily, understanding, considerate, .. I am sure you also knew that deep down in his heart, no matter how he is sensitive towards you or trying to be as considerate as possible, he is hurt. He is trying all he can to make you happy.
Bear in mind that everyone has their limitations. If you push Mr Goody too hard, some day, he won’t be able to take it anymore and he will leave. You don’t want this to happen right? it will be tragic.
Perhaps I haven’t met the true great love as yet. Somehow or another, if I were to have crushes or infatuations, I will analyze myself… if it is worth it to fret if I can’t keep them? Will they be happier without me? Then I will wish them all the best in whoever they want to be with, even can be sincerely happy about it.
Last week, I went to visit a friend whom I really had a crush on when his baby is one month old. I was more than happy to show that I am happy for him, even though I don’t like his wife. We had a long history – just me and him, coz he is broken hearted by his wife before they were married, the wife is two timing him. (before marriage). I was his listening ears and a shoulder to cry on for about 1 year …indirectly, I started to develop feelings for him…. then the wife decide to get back to him. I was devastated. He of coz, is happy coz this fool is so much in love with her. He doesn’t know that I love him.. I think he knew yet he doesn’t desert me or avoid me and he shows that he still care for me. As much as I have cared for him previously.
Now, I have accepted that he is married with a kid, even if he is always arguing with his wife over a lot of things.. I didn’t pray that he will break up or divorce. In fact, I hope they will be able to deal with their differences. After all.. this is what marriage is all about.
----- Original Message -----
From: Missy
To: 'Aunt Agony'
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 3:19 PM
Subject: RE: bday in office
Thank you for being very true in your reply to me .. I realize how lucky i am to have Mr Goody... even when i confessed that I have infatuation for another person ... he says that he loves me all the same... and the only way for me to get out of this depression mode is to concentrate in him - (ie to forget the infatuation) and love him... and be faithful and good... that way, will keep things in control for me ... I think he is right ... he is trying really hard to get me a confortable life and is even ok if I do not want to work ..
I will take your advice for sure Gina ... sometimes, I think you are prob the only fren whom I can really speak to.. and who won;t laugh at me... but rather give me true feedback ... and I appreciate this ... I'll repay this when I get the chance to ok...
it is difficult to let go of the person whom I am infautated with ... it is not easy... but you gotta help me through this ... I feel extremely sad needing to let go of this emotion and feeling ... and it brings tears to my eyes a lot of times when I think of them ... but like I said it myself in my message below... all these sufferrrings would not change the outcome ... only difference is how much I hurt ... and it would not be known by the other party anyways ... but Mr Goody is sensitive enough ... when I call him to tell him that I am depressed ... he immediately knows that it is becos I am thinking of the other person ... but kept quiet about it... until I told him I feel depressed cos I am thinking of this other one ... then only he said that he already knows it ... and just did not want to bring it up ... hmmm... I think I should thank the Lord for giving me Mr Goody ...
tell me more to convince me that my infatuation is utterly stupid and silly ... I need to be convinceed.... cos I know this is not the right thing to do... but it holds a big portion in my heart...
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 3:12 PM
To: Missy
Subject: Re: bday in office
aiyoh... why so damn depressed? you are married now for christ's sake. let go all those feelings. one day, when you are old and grey with Mr Goody, resminiscing old times, both of you will laugh at it, how silly you are .. and it is good that Mr Goody stands by you till the very end. I have a feeling that he will stand by you till the end. He is a good guy. Don't take him for granted.
he even knew how to console you. this is a good sign. it says that, no matter how your heart felt, he is always there for you. willing to listen and willing to give you time. there is nobody else who can be as understanding as Mr Goody, I believe. he is emotionally mature for a guy.
no point to fret over someone who doesnt even know that you like him.
for me, i dont care. really. it was just a crush i maintained since i was 15. hahahha. come to think of it. quite silly also.
so, i will make sure i treasure those ppl who are around me now. not wait till they go away or passed away, then only start to regret, why we dont treat them better when they are alive?
----- Original Message -----
From: Missy
To: 'Aunt Agony'
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 2:51 PM
Subject: RE: bday in office
life is sometimes not what we want them to be .... you know ... at times, we expect things from some folks whom we like a lot, and I really mean a LOT... but they may have a different opinion... I know how you feel... cos I feel the same way ... it is difficult to let go of this liking/feeling about this person(s) whom you have developed an infatuation/liking for ... there is this hurt and pain and sorrow that only you can tell yourself.. and no one can delve into this better than you... and though in your heart you know that things are impossible (given the negative responses from the opposite parties).... our hearts just refuse to listen to our brain... and we go into an emotional cycle.. which drains us ... I felt this one time.. and it is definitely not good ... you know what I mean right?
I am beginning to let go of this infatuation and learning to love the right person .. this is honest confession ... and it hurts very badly ... sometimes, when I am alone, it makes me feel like crying ... and then what do I do? I call Mr Goody .. I tell him I am really depressed and why ... he tells me to let go of the feeling .. I am trying very hard ... very very hard .. but it is difficult .. cos I am a rather "emotionally-stubborn" person - and moreover, this is my emotion/feelings.. not just another piece of old clothing that we cna easily throw away and forget ... right?
in my brain, I know this is the right thing to do .. but my heart just puts more slashes to my heart and cuts it deep ... cos I really treasure this feeling ... but at the end of the day ... with millions of slashes and cuts, the end-result would remain the same ... no change .. and to think about it .. the other party may not even know this kind/serious turmoil that we are going through ... and they woudl not change anyways... regardless... so, there is no true point in continually feeling hurt and sad...
sorry, I have been in kinda a depression mode for a little bit... and that is why I write these smoothly on an email to you today ... I hope my telling you my misery, you'll feel better ... though it may not be the exact same thing ... life has got to go on... let go and let's go on ... I am trying hard .. I hope you can too... and I know you can do it better ... cos you have a stronger character than me ... right Gina? I am still very sad now ... to say the least....
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 2:07 PM
To: Missy
Subject: Re: bday in office
what to do? ong also useless. ppl still extend my probation.
so how? yesterday i consulted a friend. she said to quit my job.
saying ppl with my capabilities dont worry not getting job outside.
good news. i already got my ACIS. which is my license!
decide to forget about tai tau totally after he failed to call me on my bday.
just an sms 2 days in advanced
----- Original Message -----
From: Missy
To: 'Aunt Agony'
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 1:02 PM
Subject: RE: bday in office
sure of course ong punya ... don't worry :)
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 11:39 AM
To: Missy
Subject: Re: bday in office
yeah. he is ok looking. got nice buck teeth. so cute. hahaha
they say purplish red is ong color. so i also hope to ong on my bday.
----- Original Message -----
From: Missy
To: 'Aunt Agony'
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 11:28 AM
Subject: RE: bday in office
lucky you ...
that guy is ok looking ... but seems to be good fit for husband candidate ... too bad taken? how officially taken should be the question ... heheheheh... hey, I like you in your outfit... fits your _expression and emotions very nicely ... cozy and comfy... :)
-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt Agony
Sent: Monday, February 16, 2004 11:01 AM
To: Undisclosed-Recipient:;
Subject: bday in office
see how nice my colleagues are to me. unfortunately, they are not my boss.
cute or not that guy? too bad taken.
Comments